Clark Gable.

Wow.

This is one of those moments where you find a song that is utterly profound, because it speaks such truths about your own life. If I had to sum up a huge part of who I am it would be this line in the song, "I want so badly to believe that 'there is truth, that love is real' And I want life in every word to the extent that it's absurd."

I look for life to be like one of the great movies I've seen.

Thanks Postal Service.

"Clark Gable"

I was waiting for a cross-town train in the London underground when it struck me
That I've been waiting since birth to find a love that would look and sound like a movie
So I changed my plans I rented a camera and a van and then I called you
"I need you to pretend that we are in love again" and you agreed to

I want so badly to believe that "there is truth, that love is real"
And I want life in every word to the extent that it's absurd

I greased the lens and framed the shot using a friend as my stand-in
The script it called for rain but it was clear that day so we faked it
The marker snapped and I yelled "quiet on the set" and then called "action!"
And I kissed you in a style that Clark Gable would have admired (I thought it classic)

I want so badly to believe that "there is truth, that love is real"
And I want life in every word to the extent that it's absurd

I know you're wise beyond your years, but do you ever get the fear
That your perfect verse is just a lie you tell yourself to help you get by?

"Welcome to LA. Welcome to the Party"

Yesterday my two friends and I did the Hollywood sign hike! For such a long time I had always talked about the certain hikes I wanted to do in L.A. (Hollywood sign hike being one of them) and it felt amazing to spontaneously decide to go for it! The hike was quite easy, with spacious dirt paths and breathtaking views of the city. I have this incredible city at my fingertips and I need to experience all it has to offer. Ever since I moved back to California, (I grew up in Redondo Beach, until we moved to Washington state when I was 12), to go to college I started slowly creating a list of things I wanted to do, places I wanted to see, or random adventures I had to experience in L.A. I have only done a couple of the things on my list, but plan to do many more while I can. My love for the city of L.A. and Southern California in general has grown greatly since moving back here, which gives me mixed emotions about the possibility of moving away after graduating, but I have a feeling I will make my way back to the sunshine state someday. If I do end up staying in L.A. after graduating then I will know all the must haves in the city for a great time.

My list so far:

1. Standard hotel rooftop bar

2. Santa Monica Pier

3. Fly kites at Venice Beach

4. Other hikes in L.A. such as Runyon canyon

5. Wine tasting at San Antonio Winery

6. Museums: J Paul Getty Museum & Natural History Museum

7. Griffith Park

8. Bradbury Building

9. Monastery of Angels

10. Venice Canal walkways

11. Paramount Studios

12. Randys Donuts

13. Urban Light (landmark)

14. Toast Bakery

15. Beverly Hot Springs Spa

16. Catalina Island

Let Go and Live

Why can't we want what we should want?

Why can't we feel what we should feel?

Why can't we do what we should do?

These are all questions I ask myself. We never seem to do things the way we should or manage to time anything correctly. The way we see our lives turning out is never the exact image of the way our lives unfold. It's like those scenes in movies where the screen is split between reality and expectations. It stresses us out nowadays when we feel like we are not in control because something does not go as planned. One of my best friends, Brittany, and I were talking about how we don't like when we don't feel in control because it ties in with our insecurity of feeling vulnerable. I am all for being ambitious and having goals and dreams for myself to achieve and having it be in my control to do my best to reach those goals and dreams. This said, my point is we need to realize that we cannot be in control of everything and need to take baby steps to be okay with that. Great things happen unexpectedly therefore shouldn't we welcome the unexpected?

We can create our chapters but we shouldn't try to fill in all the writing. Let our lives write themselves. Let's not care how our timelines compare with that of a conventional or practical lifestyle; our differences and unique experiences make our lives our own and no one elses.

As a friend of mine once said, "Carpe diem that shit".